Would You Be His Only Bird?

There comes a time in everyone's life when you feel like leaving your original skin and start to weave a new customized clothing for those soft emotions and that palpable, palpitated and tender heart of yours. Martin's road spelled a fracas of impediments and when his pen speaks more than his lips, this is what he writes:  

All my endeavours, all my cries are turning pale and white

This strong black ray of darkness is tormenting my sight
What has passed; what may happen next is not what I care
But if you'll be there to share my ruthless suffering in this inescapable snare.

** I'm sorry for expecting my mirror image in you. I'm sorry for failing to be the you for you. I am sorry for imposing my happiness and morbid sadness on you but this life makes a hell lot of sense when I say that I want it that way. 

You'll always will be my only real friend who'll be there till the end

'Cause nothing in this life ever lasts but moments which we spent

Looking into this box of memories, I feel you as I felt you then

I still remember how I stole you away from all those craving men!

** I'm sorry for being the worst transition of your life. I'm sorry for severing your hopes and desires into specks of dust. I'm sorry for hurting your heart like an awful canine and crushing its splinters. I'm sorry for destroying and losing my inner-self in between these sands of time and these blues. I'm sorry for shortening your smile and pushing your happiness deep down the isle.

I wish I could turn the time for you; for myself. With these penitent emotions and this hapless fire, I wish I could make you mine once again. 

Don't say goodbye, 'cause it's not over. And that's the way it's supposed to be.

Right now, he's sitting by the window; staring into the blue skies without any ray of hope and faith. I wonder when his sun would come back and shine with same verve and brightness. I just wonder, for I am just a damn diary sitting wherever he leaves me. I'm glad that he doesn't know that you know all of his somberness and are surreptitiously hoping for his win over life. I'll keep coming by and telling you all about Martin's life until he decides to throw me away and move on. Would you be his only bird and give him the answer of his misery?
                                                                                                  ~ Martin's Diary, 14th March, 1989

Read Martin's Diary's first post: A Stain Is A Relation Which Always Comes Back.

Cutting Me With A Tea And A Cake

Here's what spilled out after I got severed:


T - Torpid. Yup! I'm a lazy bum! Perhaps not a quality to be so proud about. Right?!

E - Eccentric. I'm strange in my own way and indulge in activities which surprise and mystify me at that jiffy.

A - Altruistic. This is one of those rare qualities I like about that shoddy man in the mirror and often brag about.

C - Careless. The picture you see in this post is an example of that!

A - Adventurous. This is one tagged quality which every young soul is endowed with but its combination with the E of tea above concocts to something unexpected and dangerous!

K - Kaleidoscopic. I'm constantly changing and have learnt to make this infernal blade of time my favourite clad.

E - Earthy. You'll find me doing most simple things in most simple way and perhaps tag me as bland.

PS -The above mentioned qualities are a work of fiction stitched together by a clumsy man I imitate every morning. He says they are subject to change with the sands of time.
PPS - This is a reply to Preeti Shenoy's Tuesday Prompts #5. 

Book Review: Another Chance

True love really exists. World is a small place. If we believe in something and think about it long enough, the entire universe conspires for it to happen. All of the above statements are just a few thoughts that instigated in my mind as I read “Another Chance” by Ahmed Faiyaz.

A girl’s journey through the prime of her life, having been with a maniac college boyfriend to barely discovering what she was beginning to believe was true love, a relationship cut short due to then circumstances and sacrifice. And then her being conned into an unsuccessful marriage after putting everything on stake, and getting uprooted from where she belonged, to ultimately fate bumping her into her true love from the past and everything seeming just right, but not for too long, before they started to fall apart yet again and eventually her getting together with her high school sweetheart which seemed like the only stable period in her life, only to find out that her true love from the past is where she belongs and whom she is destined to be with. All of this has been captured beautifully by Ahmed Faiyaz as part of his work in this book.

Variations of all the highs and lows that the central character of enchantingly beautiful Ruheen experiences in a short period of her life, and all the dramatic moves made by Aditya, that only a love struck individual maybe capable of implementing, really makes the reader want to believe that true love still exists and though there maybe a lot of pain that one has to experience during the journey, but at the end of it, it is all worth it. One of the quotes that really caught my attentions was - “It is love that gives birth to every single emotion under the sun”. After reading and relating to the range of emotions that the key characters of Ruheen and Aditya along with the supporting characters of Varun and Malika have gone through, be it truly being in love or even an uncertain feeling of being in love, I can agree with the statement that love truly gives birth to emotions that one would never otherwise experience or realize.

As part of the author’s prose, I especially liked how he has made use of the element of introducing and including music in a lot of scenes, as it helps describe the situation and the mood perfectly while connecting and putting the reader in the intended state of mind. I also enjoyed how the story line moves back and forth revealing just enough information for the reader to continue and not necessarily disclosing the entire story, as it kept me engrossed and wanting to know how each event would conclude and the background associated with it. Some of the other techniques that were noteworthy besides description of the characters were Aditya’s work life and well as his letters to Ruheen towards the end.

However, apart from some smattering printing errors and grammatical glitches, the extra explanation of Aditya’s stint in sales and distribution and the visit to Amsterdam may be tagged as an exaggeration which though is easily overshadowed by the strong script and easy language used by the author. Usage of Hindi in the book was personally disliked by me.

On the whole, it was an enjoyable quick read, with a great feel good factor and a sentimental bend which will surely leave you in the sea of imagination, gripped and craving for more. 

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Something About Love

                               Broken Pieces

They say love's a divine iridescent passion
Seldom do they tell about it's pompous reaction
Why do you feel love is brightness and solace?
It contains prolific misery and screeching grimace
It weakens you under the walls of trust and faith


Of all the wonders that you should fear
Love's the most powerful and sweetest poison
This is what a broken soul has to hurl
Stop and stare before you dare to dive in this love sphere
For there's nothing in this world as perennial and perpetual; they're just damn words.


* Tears stream down the sallow skin when the attachment turns into hatred. Feelings turn into somber sentiments and questions rule over all your answers. It hurts when all your questions are unanswered and still life chooses to move on, stepping upon the splinters of your heart. There're wounds time cannot heal because the pain is just too real.

A Stain Is A Relation Which Always Comes Back

Life's an inescapable maze when you fall into the sea of love. The only way to see the sunshine is to love more; and more until you realize that it's like a tea-stain which does not have to go. This is a short story of a boy named Martin and his feeling called Love :

There was a boy; very lonely
Always secluded and thinking aberrantly
Dreams were his only creative art
Yet his life was vapid from the start

One day there was an empyrean maiden
Sitting on the shore of his owned steam
With a lit up face and sadness hidden
'Let me see who has stopped by my dream?'

Next day came with a new sunshine
Every cloud had a silver line
Hands held and smiles flew
Somber darkness turned skew

But as they say, "Love makes you pay"
Winds turned gale and sky turned grey
Beneath the sands of time his love felt prey
Savaging hearts was love's mere play
Darkness once again filled his cart
Yet he strives to find the girl who coloured his art.

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Life capsized. Martin lives in town with a full hour job and his alone self. Seldom do I see him smiling and writing something happy. But today he has written something full of exaltation and also the smallest of the diary entry's he's written in times! Let me show you :


Insanity is love's greatest play
I rant my soul on this beautiful day
Got back my treasure and my dream
Found her waiting by the stream
Now, there's nothing to lose and gain
For every true relation's like a tea-stain

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If you're wondering who am I then let's just say I'm his diary containing his feelings, emotions and all that the world doesn't know about him. This was his story and I'm telling you this because, when the heart cries and feelings unfold, world must know a story untold. And the answer to your next question, where did Jenny vanish away suddenly is that I don't know. He never told me. Maybe she never vanished; from his heart.

                                      "Drop your feelings before they become heavy and fall off themselves"
                                                                                             ~ Martin's Diary, 25th February, 1986

PS - This post is in reply to Preeti Shenoy's creative prompt #4. Happy Valentine's Day!

I Can Crush Curves With Your Smile

With the beauty of your smile

My heart runs mile after mile

Step by step you're swilling my isle

Let's walk together and make our journey worthwhile. 

^ Life's nothing but a sinusoidal line flowing moment by moment; curve by curve. But when you have a lovable soul standing beside you, there's a  power in yourself to crush those curves.

*****                                                                                                                                    *****

Suns seems brighter and waves of feelings swishes me in parts as I make someone special smile from the core of their heart. Go on, make an effort for there's not a feeling as great as making this art.  

A Tea Of Feelings; My First Shot

"A pan, tea leaves, some sugar, milk, spoon and of course gas!", replies my vexed mother as she flips the side on her quilt.

"Look mom, I'm just giving a shot and a shot means a very willing and diligent try to get over with the task! Okay?", flummoxed from my own words, I try to ease out my mother who just passes a gargantuan snore as my answer.

I am a boy, rather a brat who has always been served and fed on the table gratuitously. Spending really long twenty years on this planet, I am more than sure that every mother in any specie can give her life for the life she has created with unmounted hope, emotions and unstoppable effort. 'What if this relation could genetically be programmed into every being with irate and hatred?' Well, too much sugar too is bad for health. --- Collecting all these sinusoidal feelings, I mix them inside what I call, 'my-cup-of-my-tea'.

As the liquid takes its colour, my eyes twinkle and smile gallops around my face and it feels like I've conquered the Earth! I take out my favourite cup and wash it with intense hot water which I know will extirpate all the dirt which is trying to make my tea sordid. Not so easy fellas! I'm the mother of that liquid thing, I think ironically.

All prepared, I pick up my cup and sit by the window. As I take my first sip, I become extremely overwhelmed. I'm drinking my feelings! Aptness of sugar and milk gave it a unique and perfect taste. Exuberance drooling all over my face, I take a heavier sip and off my mind flies into those feelings which now make way to my heart. With my wet lips, I croon:

                                              Preeti Shenoy's third book.

With a myriad of thoughts and piles of feelings
I take a refuge to create my healing
Amidst this chaos, I bend to collect my peelings
For I need them to restructure my broken red window; not so fragile anymore.

Tethered and pushed down, my hearts yearns for love; I'll still be myself and I'll still be mighty
For there is no trouble so great that cannot be much diminished by a cup of my-tea.


 PS - This post is in reply to Preeti Shenoy's Tea for two(and a piece of cake) tuesdays, #3.