Self-Destruct

There comes a phase in everyone's life when darkness seems to sheathe you, everything around seems useless and you don't care what's happening around you and even to you. It's just a hurdle of life which each one of us has to cross to become strong for the much tougher road ahead. But sometimes, it's not that easy. The jump that was taken only to cross that dark shade on the road can lead to a pit, a more blacker pit.

Life's only based on one principle, "You Never Know" principle. You never know when things will flip one-eighty and leave you crestfallen. You never know when happiness will take a bow out of your busy life only to let a somber beast dive in.

***
It's been a long time now since I laughed happily and let myself go. It hurts. They say it's your choice, but sometimes choices are the ones that lead to downfall and for once you don't trust yourself to be right. Finally realizing what being a chagrined maniac is, I write this to express my heart (which has been totally confused by it's mentor). When everything around is so happening and fast, I find myself slow and steady (Today, slow and steady loses the race). May be it's because I feel numb and torpid. And this numbness, (assisting the dark sheath I am in) is eating me slowly. Day by day, moment by moment. Expectations doesn't seem to be the word for me now as I am to myself most of the time, thinking and thinking. Does getting attached to the extent of craziness always gives you tears and remorse? Does accepting blames and accusations solves everything? And is happiness the only aim of our lives? I never get answers, only thing I have gained is, experience.

My day goes on solving Rubic's cube and connecting with music. Sometimes, all we need is Someone to Save you.

***
Confusing, sad and whimpering post. Basically a reflection of me.

But if my life is for rent and I don't learn to buy
Well I deserve nothing more than I get
Cos nothing I have is truly mine.

You are so much longer, that makes sense apathy in disguise.

They say you need to hold on a bit longer, to realize. I realized, sometimes it's better to just float and not strive. For if you come back, I'll just hope that the wind has turned around and we can make it till the end. As for now, I close my eyes and wish for self-destruct. 

When Wheels brought Happiness..

Exuberance, Ebullience, Excited and Glad. Some emotions which filled me today, just as water swills an empty glass. Sometimes things happen when you least expect. I suppose that's one rule of Life, surprise.

Today, I was flabbergasted to see a small, purple packet in my bag, with no name. No, it can't be my mom, she hates purple, I thought. 'Where on on earth did this purple box come from?', I wondered stressing my mind. I couldn't think of anyone who could possibly gift me something lest it's my birthday. My hands ran out to open the packet as soon as I was ensconced in my car.  And ohh! There blasted the largest bubble of emotions! With eyes showing water and lips curving and trembling, I FELT LOVE.


It was..

<Grin>
Goshh!! Look at them, are they just gorgeous? It's a worldly gift for a die hard wheel lover, isn't it? And '69 Mustang, '66 Nova and Chrysler UC 2008 enter elegantly to my car collection. I wonder if they'll transform too.

You remembered it! I love you so much! Just when I expected it the least and just when I wished for happiness, you drove in and filled my heart with joy. Receiving and playing with those sexy wheels has always been my passion. My wishlist starts with this obsession! A heartfelt thanks and a warm hug to my most-lovable friend. (No-names, the subtitle of my blog says a town where only feelings reside. )

Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open.

I'll end by apologizing to Sunny, (one of my college mates) for not talking to her properly. A heartfelt sorry sunn.

P.S - "Love" does not always mean a girlfriend-boyfriend relationship. It's often said when you feel the attachment, have no words to express and just feel blessed to have that person with you.

When I lost my FriEnD..

With head bowed down and loneliness sheathing, I come here today to try and break the crag of distress and regret that has been pilling up from a long time now..

It really hurts when someone so beloved, someone so close, someone so dear to us takes an exit on the whim. It hurts deep beneath. She, was my best friend, my pot of secrets and my most lovely admirer. And then one day, she disappeared, deciding what's best for her, leaving her best friend in remorse. Reason, (which I figure), she assumed he was hiding things, playing with her feelings and  was not being a true friend. She didn't utter a word and left without a notice, without listening to me. Was that good enough a reason to flush him out of her life?

With time, priorities slowly start to alter. And this leads to an inevitable change in our lives. It brings distances, fights, breakdowns and experiences (a lot more) with itself. (I am here talking about the change with respect to any relation.) It changed everything between us. Our lives, our moments and our bond. We grew apart, far from each other. New faces filled our lives and stacked our minds with new memories. We had to manage the change we were going through, right? And we had to make both the ends meet, anyhow. We failed drastically. Reason that I described above(in the previous para) came through a drastic and tragic incident which I'll rather not discuss. Maybe it was a result of the distance between us or because you expected a lot more. 

I see your face in my mind as I drive away
'Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way
People are people and sometimes we change our minds
But it's killing me to see you go after all this time

Music starts playin' like the end of a sad movie
It's the kinda ending you don't really wanna see
'Cause it's tragedy and it'll only bring you down
Now I don't know what to be without you around

And we know it's never simple, never easy
Never a clean break, no one here to save me
You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand

And I can't breathe
Without you, but I have to
Breathe Without you, but I have to.


Never wanted this, never want to see you hurt.

Sometimes I think of her and a sad, despondent smile takes a shape. I never wanted this my friend. Togetherness was the word for us then. What about now? Whenever I read my slam, a tear rolls and the surreal reel of that times shows itself in my mind. What a wonderful time it was! Yaadein, Yaadein, bas yaadein reh jaati hain. 

If she's reading this small piece of desperate craving, I just want her to know that I have always valued her in my life and I'll always keep her in me as my cherubic, sapient and boisterous true friend. Miss you.

With this I wish my best friend all the happiness and luck in life. Even if she does not want to be with me ever again.

~ Chagrined, Alone and Sad. 

If Only..

Just watched a movie, a movie that redefined my inner self, a movie that made my heart cry. (for the first time I suppose).  It made me feel from inside the essence and deepness of attachment and love. How touchy a movie can be?!

Seldom are such kind of movies made. The movie is called "IF ONLY.." directed by Gil Junger, starring Jennifer Love Hewitt, Paul Nicholls (I loved his accent) and Tom Wilkinson.

Nope, I ain't gonna give you the synopsis. Neither I am a critic, nor I am paid! This is just to express my  deep feelings and exuberance after watching that mesmerizing art of work and of course to come back from the trauma it gave me. It's 92 minutes of pure effusion. With romance, humor and drama getting all around you.  Music of this film will leave you spellbound and entranced. In a nutshell, for all those movie geeks out there, check this one out if you haven't yet for this movie takes you to another world, a world of intense feelings, joy, passion, sorrow, distress and reminiscence. Every actor in this film has done a great job. A loud roar for them in extolment.

For more about this movie, slither here: "If Only" at Imdb

And here's the verified torrent download link: "If Only" torrent download(DvD Rip) 

Let me just end with a great quote I learnt from this movie: "Death does not put an end to Love".
If Only I could meet Ian and Samantha!

Daily 15 Minute WoRkOuTs..

Today's thought : Exercise!

Are you annoyed of that fat hanging around your body? Is that extra bit of skin bothering you each day? If yes, read on. 

First of all kudos to for being aware about yourself and are making an effort to read this. Generally people tend to ignore these issues until they really gets exacerbated. The first step, is to understand, make a goal and set targets ( A goal to reduce that extra load on yourself and get rid of it). Measure yourself. Analyze your body first. This needs to be done from time to time. It helps in boosting confidence. It's not possible to maintain a proper chart or a dietary schedule in this busy lifestyle of today, so just mentally prepare yourself. There's no such need for all those charts, it's all about your stamina, power and dedication.

Make a start. Once you make a start and see your first results, exuberance will run through your nerves and you'll never stop. (It's experience saying here! ) In today's busy way of living, none of us have the time to exercise with a proper routine and maintain a balanced diet. It's a daunting task. Solution to this problem is, A Short-span Workout. A short-span workout is a fast and efficacious workout which takes minimal amount of time and is easy to follow. Here are some videos for a better explanation:

Cathe Friedrich's TOTAL BODY STRETCHING

15 MINUTE FULL BODY WORKOUT

15 MINUTE DESK WORKOUT

15 MINUTE PILATES HOME WORKOUT

SparkPeople STABILITY BALL WORKOUT

15-Minute ABS WORKOUT

Keeping in mind the busy schedule of the common people today, the workouts above are mostly of 10 to 15 minutes. (You can surely take out this much time!). You don't have to follow a specific routine. Just keep changing. Surprise your body! Shuffle through these videos. For more such videos, just type in 'workouts at home' on Youtube.

Be correct, safe and careful. It's not about repetitions, it's about the correct movement and posture. Stay Fit!

PS - It is advisable to take a rich protein diet. It helps in increasing stamina. Remember, a fit body entails a rich and balanced diet. However, consumption of any kind of steroids is not recommended. (They may have side effects). Stay Raw, Stay Natural. 

My Independence Day ride..!

Zillions of kites smudged the sky today. For once in a year this day, our eyes look up in the sky for more than a second, searching for our little wind sailor. Wish I too could sail in the air and feel the coldness just as a kite does. Well well, wishing does give an ephemeral joy. It's been 64 years since we got her back. Happy 64th Independence Day!

My independence day was not filled with discussions criticizing this nation and wondering whether we are really independent. It was a little different, a little unexpected, and a little scienceful. Here it goes..

Travelling in metro has always been a task. People fly in like swarm of bees and squash in. But today, I had a different journey in there, surprisingly a pleasant one. Today for the first time, I traveled with my mom and dad in metro, all the way till Pragati Maidan. It took us one and a half hour, standing. Still, I saw the first-time smile on their faces. It was satisfying and overwhelming to see my parents smirk and talk joyfully. They actually praised Metro! And they actually admired the services and comfort it provided. It's unbelievable and we are really blessed to have such kind of services, they said. Guess this might be a perfect gift to my country by my parents this day!

We went there for Science Exhibition (Science Exhibition on 15th August! Peculiar, isn't it?). Students from all around the country had gathered there to present their innovative science models. It gave me an immense proud feeling to see these young minds demonstrate their unique models so efficaciously. All around I could see models with ways to harvest water, reduce greenhouse gases, to use power efficiently and so on. I could see the power of young minds grow. Students as young as fourteen to fifteen did a fantabulous job! Me and my parents were flabbergasted and I couldn't resist myself from clicking a few photos.

Switching off/on any 3 home appliances via your cellphone.

  Generating electricity from speed brakers on roads.

6 way movable electric crane.

Static cycle gym!

Whoa! Now that's what I call a real Independence day celebration. Witnessing our own youth, our own country grow is a great feeling. Overall, it was a joyful and an interactive ride through science. We enjoyed. My mom, being a biology teacher got some project topics and model ideas for her class, she does love experiments! 

After the experimental and scientific journey in the morning, we rushed to my cousins' place for some K- fun, as we call it, that is, the Kite flying fun. Kite flying on this day symbolizes independence and the exuberance of the people. Keeping this in mind and enunciating "Jai Hind" slogan, our kites took a leap in the dark blue sky. Though it was not airy today, but it didn't really matter. There are experts sitting in every corner of Delhi, a one myself! It was fun. And the icing on the cake was a beautiful scintillating rainbow after a slight drizzle. Sky showing it's seven basic colours in a semicircle today. How's that to make this independence day so special?

It was a special, unique and happening independence day this year.  

Not forgetting all the soldiers and natives who laid their lives for us back then and those who without any fear are standing at border only to make us safe, I salute them with all my heart and praise, JAI HIND! It's My India.

Starting Afresh in Life..

Let me just start with some questions. How often have you felt the urge of starting everything from the scratch? How often do you feel like giving up what you really are just being in peace somewhere very very far away? Thought for today is, Starting Afresh. Most of us have changes (good and bad) in our life and often we feel like starting everything again, from the beginning. Seldom do we succeed. More often, we end up feeling the same way. Reason is simple, feelings and memories are two things which cannot be expunged. Somewhere somehow they come back. Then how to make a fresh start in life? What exactly do we need to change?

It's our inner self. For a fresh start at any point in your life, you need to walk through yourself first and figure out what have you been doing till now and why you need a fresh start. There are times when we feel sad, depressed, and broken. Then, all we need to do is to just take time and think about ourselves for a while. Taking a fresh start is something different. A fresh start in life is to reborn. It nowhere relates to correcting your mistakes in future and being a perfectionist. This is where most of us are wrong. You don't have to plan how your new start will be! Just be ready to give a full stop to your present. It's like entering into a new world of our own. You just have to take a step ahead and just let yourself go. Dive in!

If you have already given a shot and it backfired, you just need to go back and think it all over again. Where did it all go wrong? What was that which prohibited you from making a new self? Just try and find out the answer in yourself. Try listing down some facts. Making a list always helps! You cannot get a fresh start maybe because, "you're just bringing your old self into what you think is going to be new", as quoted by Dr. Dickstein. Correct, isn't he? In an interesting conversation, I heard that you can't get a new start because you imagine a new perception of yourself on the basis of past experiences. This is where you make a mistake! You already gave your new start a past theme. Starting afresh means just starting everything all over again, it never means correcting your mistakes.


What I am trying to say here is, starting everything all over again is not just a feeling or a possession. It's about getting a new you. It's about having a new relationship with life. So you've got this flowering taking place in you, and this flowering is newness itself. In a nutshell, to make a new start, forget your past completely and take a new birth. Never let those memories haunt you. And if they do, override them with new ones! Life's too short. Don't waste time in regretting and being in the past.


I write this to tell my inner self that sometimes life just haults for a while, that's the time you need to get a new life, a new start! Just let yourself go. Find a new you. Coz it's never too late to start again.

Lose everything that hold's you back in your old life. Just Empezar todo de nuevo, start everything afresh. 

LIVE-AGAIN, will you??

Life's so unpredictable. And life's so short. Anything can happen in a split moment. It can flip 180's in a matter of days.  

Travelling in metro, I have lot of empty time. With nothing to do, I think. Strange for some people, but yeah I play with my thoughts. Today, this strange question boggled my head, "What if you just come to know in next ten minutes that you have last 6 months of your life left?". I had no answer. All I had was, a feeling. A Feeling of THE END.

We all dream. We all want to enjoy life. We all want to laugh our hearts out. But seldom do we do all the things we dream. The responsibility barrier always stops us in one or the other way. It's said, "Dreaming or awake, we perceive only events that have meaning to us". Relating this thought with the above, I came to my answer. In those last six months, I will follow my dreams. I'll do whatever it takes to make my heart satisfied, whatever it takes to be happy. This entangling of thoughts resulted into a List, which I call "LIVE-AGAIN LIST". This list would comprise of all my dreams which I would want to fulfill before I die. Who knows which sequence death is following and who's next! I finally managed to capture my few dreams and make a list, here it goes:

1) SKYDIVING:  

Almost half of my dreams are caught by this escapade adventure sport. I just Love this!! Heightophobia is a past thing when it comes to this dare. This is my first choice!

2) CASINOS, FLASH, AND ALCOHOL: 

Vegas! I dream to visit Vegas and splash myself and make best friends with Scotch! This is gonna be rock hard fun, what say?!

3) UNDERWATER SCUBA- DIVING: 

Floating with those surreal, ethereal creatures is my worldly desire! Just letting things go and being with those beautiful corals is a sure to do on this list. 

4) DRIVING A LAMBORGHINI, RACING AND RAISING!: 

Look at her!! Isn't she gorgeous?! Just love these ravishing cars. Lamb has been my all time favourite. I dream of just hitting the road with this hot and dazzling honeybee! <Engine roar>

5) VISIT TO ANTARCTICA: 

Ice. Only ice. A true escapade. This also is a sure thing in my list. I love snow!

6) LAUGH MY HEART OUT: I don't have any image for this one. It's my heart which is buried deep inside. Yet unfulfilled, I dream I have someone in my life who makes me feel this. Dreaming means no harm, so why not Megan Fox dates with me! <Grin>

7) ACT LIKE A TOTAL PSYCHO, MANIAC: Now again this one is on my mind since my high school! This must be definitely fun. I'll just be a maniac totally and do all the things with full force!

8) EAT WITHOUT CARE, EAT MADLY: Ahh! I am a big big foody! I want to eat like an animal when I don't have much time left. Who knows if hell has this kinda eclectic menu and vivacious food!

9) VISIT DESERTS, PYRAMIDS, EXPERIENCE RENAISSANCE!:

I have always admired the epochs and the stories these pyramids have on them. I had always dreamt of seeing them myself. I still feel that they have some secrets in them which are still not revealed. And of course the camel ride in desert!

10) PUBLISH THE STORY OF MY LIFE:

Last one that comes to my small mind at this time. I want the story of my life to be published. I can't figure out a reason why, maybe I am a cancerian that's why!

These are some dreams which give me internal happiness and an internal smile, which is mine. Totally alone, in nothingness my mind shapes them with a hope that they will come true, someday.

(With this hope, I wipe my salty tears.)

When a star called Sonal dropped by...

SONAL KALRA - "And just went through ur blog @rachit. Very nice...the best part is that apart from good writing, it has great variety when it comes to subjects. Unlike a lot of blogs that are mostly abt the bloggers own life, it's personal but useful. Loved the typo art one for ur sis :)"

My blog's first reviews. From my inspiration herself. Feeling of elation is running through my nerves!

Just when the things were looking wavy, 

Someone just came by and gave me a pocketful of Sunshine.

To Sonal mam, You made my day. Inspiration is one sobriquet for you. You'r a perfect start to my every Sunday.

An avid reader.

"I am always Right" Syndrome..

Recall your last fight or argument.

Why is it so hard to give a deep look into yourself and find your own mistakes?

This is for all those cupid-loving people out there trying hard not to include fights on their common roads.

"I am always right" syndrome can have a crag dropped on your head if you continue being Bossy in your relationship. Trust me, it's my experience! It's called, "I AM THE KING" attitude in loud words. So, the next time you fight:

1.  AVOID THE 'BACKFIRE' ATTIUDE: Don't start backfiring before you listen to your partner completely. It can be annoying. Try to maintain peace and calm as much as possible. Even if your partner says something offensive to you, "be nice in the face of nastiness". This allows you to get to the end of the disagreement faster and to come to some sort of compromise.
2. DON'T ASSUME: As it is quoted, "Assumptions are termites of a relationship". Never assume before you know. First know the complete situation and then argue. It seems foolish when two people fight over something that never happened. Make sure that your partner gets your side of the story before both of you reach a decision whether to start everything afresh or to end it. 
3. DON'T RAISE YOUR VOICE, LEARN TO TALK!: Raising voice will only raise exasperation. Let the other person finish. Raising voice and trying to suppress the other person does no good. It's blatant to raise your voice in any sort of argument. Again, talk softly, even if the situation is intolerable. It helps.
4. STOP BLAMING EACH OTHER: Instead of blaming each other, try and find the solution to the problems. Blaming each other will only worsen the situation. Last thing you want is a list of blames and a full stop on your relationship. This is most common mistake. Understand the situation and try to resolve the fight rather than blaming. 
5. TAKE THE INITIAL STEP: Take the first step and discuss the problems rather than fighting aimlessly. Couples often fight endlessly. None of them take the initial step to calm things out and discuss. Try this, you'll definitely get a hug at the end! 
6. NEVER EVER ABUSE: You don't love if you abuse your partner. It's mannerless, shameless and highly disrespectful. He/She is not your servant. Respect is the word. It's said, "Treat others as you want them to treat you because what goes around comes around". Start respecting your partner and you'll feel the love.
7. DON'T THINK OF WINNING VERSUS LOSING: Winning should not even be a word you think of when arguing with your significant other. "A fight should never be an all-or-nothing competition", says Kurland. Compromise is the key. It's not who wins the matches, it's how the game is played.
8. REMEMBER, YOU ARE NOT ALWAYS RIGHT: You'r not the Boss. And you know how bosses are hated and made fun of covertly, right? Stop being the king and start admitting your mistakes. This can take you worlds in your relationship. This 'I am the king' attitude does no good, instead suppresses your partner which obviously is a negative sign. Expiation is the key.

These are some points which I scooped out from my mind. Directly or indirectly related to "I am always right" attitude, they might help you to get a good life with your partner. Just remember, relationship and love are the two special blessings from God. Think before you hurt someone, it might be you next time.

And all the above points are not only for the cupid-people, they also validate for any sort of argument, even between you and your parents. It's just that "I am always right" attitude mostly comes up between couple-fights! <Grin>

There are tough times in between good times, just as there are crackles in a fudge. Just have faith, trust, understanding, respect and time, you will have a great life ahead. 

(Not a relationship advisor or a consultant, I may have missed some points above)

A Reflection of my Feelings..

Feelings.

As a salty drop of emotions races down my cheek, my mind slowly croons. "I've never felt more lonelier, more left-out and more astonished", I said looking at my shadow. When will this period of sadness and bad luck spare me? When will I feel me again? And who on earth will make me free from these devilish arms of bitterness and doubts? Maybe time will. Don't be too late, time.

It's all about feelings you know. When feelings change, your thoughts change and with your thoughts, your world changes, for as they say, “Thoughts are the shadows of our feelings - always darker, emptier and simpler". A well experienced fact, "They may forget whatever you said, but they won't ever forget how you made them feel", is rightly quoted. Today, I feel secluded, heartbroken, annoyed and pierced. This is the first time in my life I have ever felt all this at once! Life's been a little harsh on me these days. But, it's all about the feelings, you know! With these jar of feelings I try to carve this text with an aim of calming myself.

The darkness surrounds me
It's getting so cold
I'm all alone
With no one to hold

My world is so empty
All what's left is pain
No sunshine to light my way
Just never ending rain

I drown in tears
My heart is crying
No one seems to notice
My soul is dying

Poem is titled, LOST. Poet here expresses her loneliness and writes about her dying soul. I know how she feels. Never have I felt so desperate to start everything all over again. Never in my life have I ever hated God so much, just for giving me such a long road. And never in my life have I felt so alone, just to get time to scribble all this. 

With this true feeling, I wish I had someone. Someone who would knock my door when I feel numb. Someone who would hear me when I felt overjoyed. Someone to make me feel my presence. Someone who would connect his thoughts with me. Someone who could be me, just for me and someone who could be with me as my friend, forever.


In between this mumbling thoughts, I ask you:
Do you have that one friend who will always be with you? That one soul who will be your true friend, forever?   That one soul who will be in all of your feelings and will make you feel out-of-the-world even when things are worse and out of control?  Listen to the definition of a true friend before you disturb your mind: You'r a True Friend.

Flowing through the wind, I search for my pocketful of sunshine.

(A sad and bitter post, a reflection of my Feelings)

Don't plan too much , for it may eat away your present...

Often these days, my ears are filled with the same questions again and again. Questions about my future, questions about how I want to shape my life, and questions which are very important in planning. Yet, my mind just dumps them in some cornice and moves on. I am aware that sooner or later I need to answer these questions. Just afraid of the tension and stress which ensues, my mind just toggles when it comes to these questions!

To my mind: If you continue being afraid, you'll land up in some church under some ecclesiastic begging for food and shelter! It's your life, you have to plan and be what you aspire for. Wake up!

Inhale. Exhale. 

What I want to share today is, you shouldn't be obsessed with planning. Too much planning incurs stress and tensions ensue. It's correctly said, "Most plans are just inaccurate predictions". I have seen twelve year kids joining 'institutes' for bettering their future. This desperation and obsession for a better future has entangled our thoughts to think in one direction, the direction of success. The Bible says, "So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring worries of its own. Today's trouble is enough for today". Planning is important, but only if it is done with clear understanding of goals. If done with the right thought and at time, it can take you worlds. On the other hand, planning with obsession and crave for success can harm you, both mentally and socially.

What I mean is, we should not make our lives hassled only to make our future sparkling. For it's correctly said, "Har pal yahan jee bhar jiyo, jo hai samaann kal ho na ho" ( Kal ho na ho - title track). Live the present, plan for future and forget the past. Rightly said. But 'Live the present' seems invisible from our lives. Salvaging your present, only to make your future is not the right way. The other day I met my friend after a very long time. I was amazed to see how much desperate he was, to ear money. He owns six websites, works part time for money and is trying to plan his future in a step-like manner, just to be successful and be on the echelon. I could see his urge to grow big. But I could sense a sad, lonely and a tense person inside him as he told me about his past relationship, his fights with his friends and how he had less time for his family. I tried asking him about some future planning tips (when the next time I chatted with him), he replied in his own way with a website link. Take a look, it may help you. Planning tips- For-a-Successful-Future. What do you think, where is my friend heading and will he be a successful person ten years from now? What about the social him?

Plan for the future, but don't engross yourself so much into planning that you forget your present. Live present as if there is no tomorrow, 'coz you are never sure what may happen next. "Live like there is no tomorrow" is my motto. I want to get the best out of me, Today.

"We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us"

Writing about planning is a tough job for me! Clearly inept, it makes me remember my first day at writing. I may have missed a few points.

PS - Post written in a annoying state which arose when I was asked about my future and why I was wasting time in writing this.